Sick Mommy.

So I've been really busy this past month but unfortunately most of it wasn't fun. First I had a breast infection caused by the antibiotics for my bout with mastitis. Then I had horrible food poisoning followed immediately with an excruciating tooth infection. And then this whole week has been wasted with a summer cold. Although you can't really call it a "summer cold" since Vancouver's summer hasn't even started yet - it's still mostly rain.

For the most part I have fallen into the rhythm of mommyhood...but that's when I'm healthy.

I've had plenty of practice being under the weather and saddled with kids. When I was a nanny I rarely phoned in sick. I felt bad doing it because it meant screwing up the parent's day and potentially causing them problems with their boss. So I usually just sucked it up, went in to work and had a TV day with my charges. But it always sucked having to cater to needy little monsters when I was feeling like death. As much as anyone loves babies and kids you're a liar if you don't admit that you just want them to bugger off and fend for themselves when you have the flu. But of course, as a nanny I still got to sleep through the nights undisturbed so it wasn't as bad as being a sick mommy.

Even though I know the drill being a sick mommy still sucks. Thank God I have a few tricks from my past. I pity all the poor first time mommies with no childcare experience that have to make it through their first illness with baby in tow. However my expertise still didn't stop me from running to my mommy when I fell ill.

I've always needed a lot of sleep and like most people, when I'm sick I need a lot more sleep. But getting sleep with a baby in the house is never easy. I was very lucky that my parents live close by and I was able to take Babe over to their house so they could watch her and I could focus on getting better.

The weekend that I had food poisoning and thought I was dying I spent almost the whole time under the covers and my mom would bring Babe to me when she needed cuddles or nursing. I don't know what I would've done without her.

Then the tooth infection kept me from getting sleep two nights in a row so when I finally was able to get an emergency root canal and was feeling better my mom again watched Babe so I could rest up.

After that we had a great trip to Washington D.C. and then right after I got home Babe and I caught a cold. This time my dad stepped up for me. Babe spent a few hours each day this week hanging with him in his office while I napped at my parent's house.

Here are the few tips I have for trying to survive motherhood while sick. Obviously if you can send the kids to daycare or hire a babysitter just do that.

• Sick days are sleep days. Do not try to cook or clean anything. When your child naps, just nap. Right away, stop what you're doing and lay the f**k down.

• Children need healthy food, but not on a sick day. Just feed them whatever will keep them alive until you're feeling better. Not candy, but anything remotely healthy that you don't have to fight with them to get down.

• Screw your no TV rule. As a nanny my kids rarely watched TV. But my deal for coming into work sick was that the kids would be watching the boob tube that day and if the parents didn't like it then I could just stay home. It's amazing what parents will allow a sitter to do when they have a business meeting in half an hour. If your kid is happy doing crafts or playing a board game independently than that's great but if they won't play without you then just put on a movie they love and doze beside them on the couch for two hours.  If your child is too young to sit through a movie then stockpile toys beside you on the floor, stretch out, put your head on a pillow and rest while you pass one at a time to baby. (This will probably only buy you half an hour.)

• If your kids are old enough and still healthy themselves try to arrange a play date at a friend's house and then sleep while they are gone.

• Pile toys on the floor in the bathroom and play with them - from the tub. (Don't do this if you are a nanny, it's not appropriate).

• If you have the energy to leave the house go to the toy store and pick out something new that will entertain them while you lounge on the sofa with a facecloth on your forehead. Alternatively - download a new iPad/iPhone app for them.

• Encourage older children (2.5+) to help their sick "patient". Let them fetch you water (clean up the spills tomorrow), put the thermometer under your tongue, and give you pretend medicine. If they have a toy doctor kit or just some kitchen utensils now is a good time to play hospital. You can just lay on the floor while they cover you with Band-Aids and look in your ears with the turkey baster. 

• Just about anything that is a novelty for them will hold their attention longer while you try to make the pounding in your head stop. Let them blow bubbles in the house. Mix up some water and cornstarch goop. Paint a picture for Daddy. Let them nap in a tent in the living room if it shuts them up for an hour. Nap with them in the tent if it shuts them up for an hour and a half. 

Of course most of these tips only work with toddlers and children, not babies. All you can really do with a baby is lay on the floor and try to relax while they play with blocks or crawl all over you...or pass the baby off onto someone else.

Babe and I are all better now and I'm hoping the Vancouver weather gets better too so that we can finally relax and enjoy the summer.

I love being healthy again!