Book Reviews.

After years of Nannying for families in Vancouver and beyond I have read hundreads if not thousands of bedtime stories, naptime stories, nightmare stories, boo boo stories, sick at home stories and just for fun stories. And over the years I have stashed away in my brain a list of books that are must-haves for my own baby. Some have great messages, some have great rhythm, others have amazing illustrations and some the kids just really like.

I can't cover them all here but I will start today.

#1. Babies Are Boring

By: Jon Ritchie and Alex Ritchie

www.babiesareboring.com

This one only came out a couple of years ago. A friend picked it up for me at a bookstore where the authors were signing copies. I thought it was really funny and much more fun to read than most baby books. But it wasn't until I started nannying baby Jacob who also had a copy that I realized how great it is.

While it is sarcastic and written to entertain mommies and daddies, it is still sweet and kid-appropriate.

Jacob loved it. Maybe it was the simple cartoon illustrations but I think it was the rhymes and flow of the story that he really loved. "Babies are boring, boring, boring, boring! Some when they're awake, others when they're snoring."

At eight months old Jacob new exactly where my voice would pitch and could mimic the hand actions I would make for each page seconds before I actually made them. And although he couldn't understand the books sarcastic humour, he knew it was funny.

Now when I read it to my belly the baby really likes the rhythm as well. If increased fetal movement is an indication of enjoyment.

#2. Good Night Vancouver

By: David J. Adams and Anne Rosen

www.goodnighttourworld.com

I'm guessing only locals or tourists will be interested in purchasing this book, since if you've never been to Vancouver it would be of little interest to you. But there are many others in the series that cover other cities - so look for yours at the link above.

This book is also fairly new. It hit the shelves in 2009. I picked up my copy from The Vancouver Aquarium bookstore, but I've seen it at other specialty shops and bookstores around town.

I discovered it last year when I was taking care of baby Thomas. He was only three months old so it was hard to judge if he actually preferred this book, but I thought it was a nice novelty to have a baby book about our hometown.

There's not much to say. It's similar to other good night books. I had one when I was a baby, I think it was called goodnight city and of course there is the adorable classic Goodnight Moon - neither of which are part of this series.

Basically the book runs through a list of major Vancouver landmarks, saying hello to each and expressing appreciation for it.

Not an amazing story but an inexpensive cute cardboard baby book that is much more special than a cardboard book about fluffy kittens.

#3. Oh The Places You'll Go

By: Dr. Seuss

www.seussville.com

Ok. Pretty much all his books are terrific. If you're buying books as a gift for a child aged 1-6, you really can't go wrong with Dr. Seuss. But check to make sure the kid doesn't have them all already because Dr. Seuss books are that popular.

Even if the story is a little too simple for a more advance reader, there's usually a great message in Dr. Seuss's words and the pictures are always weird - which is good for kids.

This book was the last to be published, one year before Dr. Seuss' death in 1991.

I cried when I bought this for my baby because I have dreamed of reading it to my own child. I first found it on three-year-old Jessica's book shelf and I thought the message was so great I often agreed to read her two nap time stories as long as this was one of them. She always took the deal, although that had more to do with stalling bedtime than appreciation for the book.

What can I say? I think it is actually a book for graduates (of any age). Its an introduction to the real world telling the reader all about success and failures and the ups and downs that taking a new path brings.

While the wisdom is lost on little readers some of it will surely seep through over time and it's a good reminder for grown-ups. It was an absolute must-have for my child. As soon as I bought it I sat in the car and read it to my belly - twice.

#4. Go The F**k To Sleep

By: Adam Mansbach and Ricardo Cortes

www.GotheFtoSleep.com

Fresh off the shelves! I have never read this to anyone because it's new and I haven't had the chance. Also because I might have been fired for doing so had it been around when I was nannying.

I'm reviewing it because it's a book that is all the rage right now during my own pregnancy and because of that I wanted it for my child's collection.

Will I read it to my baby? Not sure yet. I read it to my belly the other night saying "F" instead of "Fuck".

Cortes' illustrations are great. Really sweet detailed pictures of children incorporated in jungle scenes, city scenes, farm scenes, etc. And the story is funny, you can't help but laugh. I don't think my boyfriend (J) really got it, but he will once he has experienced the frustration that comes with a bombardment of bedtime excuses from a little one.

This book really only suites a certain kind of parent/reader. I think those that enjoy it do so because this is exactly what they are sometimes thinking inside their heads but would never say to their child. If you don't have those thoughts, then this may just be offensive for you.

I think it's witty and I giggled a lot. I guess only time and my level of frustration will decide if I actually use it as a bedtime story.

PS: It wasn't in the kids section of my bookstore (for good reason). I found it in humour.

Stay tuned for future reviews.

It's a Girl! Probably.

I of course couldn't wait until October to be surprised.

My impatience may be surprising to some because I have no gift anticipation at Christmas or my birthday.

But babies are different. It is my child, who will be forever in my life, not a puppy under the Christmas tree and I want to know everything about my baby as soon as the information is available.

So two weeks after my ultrasound with Jaded Tech #2 I followed the advice of my boyfriend's boss, who is also expecting, and headed off to AIM Medical Imaging in my city (Vancouver) to try again.

This time the tech was perfect. She was kind and laid back. She spent half an hour with us, about twenty minutes of which was spent on the hunt for the family jewels. She was excited for us (or at least faked it) and I left with a bunch of cute photos. I guess when you're paying (tests not ordered by your medical caretaker are not covered in Canada) you are treated more like a client and less like a cliche.

Finally the tech was able to say that she was 95 per cent sure that my little he/she is a SHE! I couldn't be happier. There are no guarantees but she assured me that if a boy pops out and I have all the wrong clothes I can send her the bill. Any chance she is serious?

For $50 I am 95 per cent sure my baby is a girl. Money well spent.

The Jaded Tech.

I have definitely had my fair share of ultrasounds during this pregnancy. So I now consider myself an expert on the process. Out of that five, two of my ultrasounds have been a huge disappointment.

I get that the purpose of an ultrasound is diagnostic and that it is not conducted for my entertainment, to calm my fears or to fill my baby book with in utero photos. But having said that, it is something that expectant parents look forward to and worry over throughout pregnancy. And every time an ultrasound is scheduled it is both exciting to see the baby and nerve-racking to hear the results.

I have had the misfortune of two jaded techs so far in this pregnancy and both times I left feeling angry and disappointed.

I understand that for them the job is boring and tedious and they are probably as eager for a coffee break as any other working stiff is. But quite frankly…I don’t give a shit what they feel. When I have to wait months for a ten-minute window into my womb to see my baby and confirm that he or she is not in peril I expect a little bedside manor. And if the tech can’t muster up some excitement then I expect that they will at least recognize that this is a big moment for the patient and fake some concern or enthusiasm.

The first horrible tech I had was when I was only seven weeks pregnant. I had been the week before for the initial ultrasound that my doctor had scheduled to date the fetus, but no heartbeat could be found. Which while completely normal for six weeks was a disaster for someone as obsessive and anxious as I am. So they had me come back the next week to try again.

Obviously I was very nervous and it showed. However I got neither a reassuring smile nor eye contact from the tech as I lay on the table waiting for her to tell me if the little spark inside me had gone out. I spent most of the time cracking little jokes to try to boost her spirits while I was falling apart with worry.

When she finally located a strong heartbeat and I began to cry with relief she sternly told me to “lay still”.

At this particular office the techs perform the diagnostic portion of the ultrasound without family or friends present and then after they allow the woman’s husband, mother, friend etc. into the room to see the baby and rejoice with or comfort the mother. This is the policy. I knew this from the previous visit, the signs posted in the lobby and the phone call I made earlier in the week to confirm that I could bring my girlfriend with me for support.

However this tech who was not just bored with the procedure but was maliciously trying to be as cold and callous as she could safely get away with refused without reason to allow my friend to come in. It didn’t matter that I had driven across town to pick up my friend. Or that the policy of the clinic was to allow me my support network.

And to top it off she allotted me one 2-second glance at my little bean with the blinking heart and denied me any further time with my baby.

I tried to calm my anger afterwards by telling myself that I was blessed that the baby was ok and that nothing else about the experience mattered. Which is true. In an attempt to excuse her behaviour I reasoned that maybe she had lost her own baby and couldn’t muster any joy for her patients. But I couldn’t reason the anger away.

With memories of the ultrasound tech from hell still haunting me the next day I decided it wasn’t fair to subject other nervous patients to the same treatment and I called her supervisor and complained. The tech I had the next time was an absolute doll.

My second jaded tech wasn’t the vengeful bitch that the first was. She was of the “move along, nothing to see here” or “ho hum” variety. This was the big ultrasound. I was excited to find out the sex and nervous about the scan’s ability to catch abnormalities. But once again I left disappointed.

This tech was briskly working her way through the morning patients with her eye on her lunch break. She muttered under her breath what every part was and how things were looking like she was whispering into a wiretap in her scrubs instead of talking to us. She made a half-assed attempt to discover the sex and another half-assed attempt to get a good photo for us.

Towards the end of the appointment she softened a little when the baby was being extra cute but for the most part she couldn’t have cared less and an appointment that was scheduled to take 45 minutes was over in under 15.

After the first bad experience I promised myself that I wouldn’t stand for it again. That next time I would politely vocalize my expectations (provided they were reasonable) instead of feel disappointed later. But the next ultrasound came and went with me biting my tongue. As outspoken as I am I find it hard to stand up for myself in this gooey situation. Lying there waiting for a stranger to tell me the fate of my baby and thus my future is enough to worry about.

I just wish the techs could remember how special this moment is for us, even though its nothing special for them.

The Nanny Graduate.

Here I am: Pregnant and blogging.

My name is Airika Owen and I recently graduated from journalism school in Vancouver B.C. I love writing and photography and I was planning on packing up my diploma and setting out for new horizons in a new town with a community paper.

But all of that is on hold for awhile because...SURPRISE...I'm having a baby instead. Thank God I researched how to freelance while raising children as a project in one of my final term classes.

So I'm setting out with a diploma in one hand and a positive pregnancy test in the other. Well...not really, I didn't keep the pee stick. But I have a photo of it.

I feel ready, trained, prepared, not in the dark, because for over ten years I worked as a nanny. Still do actually. I am heading into this with knowledge, skills and tried and tested hands on experience that very few parents have when they buckle up baby in the new car seat and pull out of the hospital parking lot.

This time there is no giving baby back at the end of the day. There is no falling in love and then leaving them behind. I have worried for, been proud of, frustrated with and exhausted by all of the little ones I have cared for, but as much as I loved them, none were for keeps. This one is mine!!!

I promise I will still feel lost. Still be confused. Still seek advice and for sure I will still feel anxious. But I am looking forward to taking my hard-earned skills and applying them to my very own baby. Just as I will take my journalism skills and apply them to my next career.

I am almost a journalist and almost a mommy. I have graduated twice this year!